"A couple talking about eating the placenta. I couldn't help but to keep listening as to how they wanted to maybe season it. Weirdest thing I've ever heard in my life. 10/10 would listen to placenta talk again."

"I was working at Olive Garden back in 2007/2008 I was dropping off food at the table across from this younger couple and I heard her tell her boyfriend (assuming) that she has herpes, that she found out a few days before when she had her first flare up. Now his response I didn't expect this, I was ready for a freak out, he calmly said Yeah I know, I've had it for years I guess the Valtrex didn't keep it at bay. To which she threw water on him flipped the salad over screamed I fucking hate you and left. And I'm standing there like fuck me I have to clean this shit up."

"Overheard a guy telling my manager his card was declined because he was involved in a $50 mil lawsuit and the opposition had a 'death hit' out on him. A good ol' boy sitting at the other end of the bar offered to pay for his drinks to shut him up and the guy said, 'I wanna eat too!' Country boy didn't skip a beat he just said, 'Well that's too fuckin bad champ because you're fucking broke.' I bought that man a beer.'"

"Family out to dinner, the kids (grown adults in their 40s) slip the server a credit card to pay for the bill before they sit down. At the end of the meal the server drops off the paid bill and thanks them. The mother flips her shit and gets irate that her kids paid the bill. Screaming about how they had no right because she was going to pay. It was like watching real life Maury Povich."

"This entire table of women was going on and on about how hot it is watching a guy eat sour cream. Did they mean just any guy? Who knows?"

"One day I was cleaning tables out on the patio when I noticed these two men had spread cheap Parmesan cheese all over their table. I went over and asked very sweetly if I could clear it off for them. They shift awkwardly and one asks, 'This is... for mosquito?' 'No, this is cheese.' They turn to each other and yell in unison 'IT IS CHEESE!' Turns out they were Danish, and very nice. Just confused."

"Years ago I was working in a Pizza Hut in a not-so-great neighborhood outside of Atlanta. I was bringing a pizza to a table where I heard two kids who were no older than 7 in the middle of this conversation: Kid A: 'Best step down bitch!' Kid B: 'Try me.' Kid A: 'See you at the crossroads!' And pointed his fingers like a gun at the other one. Kid B: 'No, see YOU at the crossroads muthafucker!' Then I asked them to sit down so I could serve the pizza."

I work in a local greasy spoon. There was a young couple in maybe their early twenties eating breakfast. At one point the girl dumps a pharmacy's worth of pills on the table and starts sorting/counting them out. When I walked by to check on them she started acting super paranoid and as I walked away I heard her say to the guy "maybe we shouldn't be doing this here, there's cameras" and she proceeded to move all of the pills back into her bag and they left. Got a really nice tip though.

"A man proposing a swinger lifestyle to his wife. She did not like it one bit. Aaaaand there I come to bring them their drinks, in the middle of the conversation."

"I was closing late one night and had a couple really high teenagers come in. They could barely sit up in the booth and ordered $80 worth of food for two people. One of the guys ordered an iced tea and asked for Splenda with it. I bought out his drink and set it on the table along with the sugar caddy. This kid just stared at it for a minute and then asked which packet was Splenda. I told him it was the yellow one. 'Um....what color is yellow?' He finally asked. I pulled a packet out of the caddy and handed it to him and walked away before I couldn't hold my laughter in anymore. As I was walking away, he turned to his friend and asked, 'Can she tell how high I am?' They tipped me a quarter."

"A couple came in for lunch, ordered 2 iced teas and the 3 course special (appetizer, entree and dessert) each (maybe 25 bucks total, the portions were smaller). After they down it in like 25 minutes when the guy gets on one knee and proposes to the lady. Keep in mind, this is like 1145 on a Tuesday. She covers her face and the guy spends 20 minutes on one knee trying to convince her to say yes.... It was the most uncomfortable thing that has ever happened to me. I had to go drop off the check while the guy was still on his knee because he called me over.... Anyway, they leave and they come back in 2 months later and engaged so it worked out!"

"While I was working at a Jose's Crustacean Hut, I was serving a well-dressed, seemingly happy couple. They ordered a steam pot for 2 and a side of fries to share. Right after I drop off the food, before I'm even out of earshot, the husband confesses to having been cheating and that he wants a divorce. She starts BAWLING HER EYES OUT to the point she's doing the whole gasping for air between sobs thing, and my manager immediately rushes over to try and see if it was something she could fix because a full restaurant on a Saturday night is not the place for screaming, sobbing women. In the end the couple stayed for 3 hours, didn't touch any of the food, and just had me throw it all out. Very weird day."

"I drove a London taxi. 2 city workers get into the back of the cab a few Christmas' [sic] ago. Guy 1 & 2. The back has a privacy screen so you can't hear anything if the intercom is switched off. On my old taxi the light that indicates it is off has broken so they think I can't hear anything... Guy 1 talks about proposing to his girlfriend in the New Year (who they both work with). Guy 2 tells him he is happy for him and it's a good idea. Guy 1 exits the cab at his house (both of these guys live in Chelsea - west side). Guy 1 then changes the destination back over to the city (east side). He phones up Guy 1's girlfriend. We pick up girlfriend from a bar. They make out in the back. He arranges to buy some cocaine; we pull into some council housing. He disappears into a flat for 10 minutes. Girlfriend then phones Guy 1 pretending that she has just got home and is off to bed 'Good night, love you.' Guy 2 returns with his cocaine. They snort some in the back and Guy 2 tells girlfriend of proposal, they both laugh and she genuinely says she will accept it, they both laugh some more and Guy 2 sincerely says he is happy for her. I take them all the way back to Chelsea. It was a huge fare and good tip. Didn't offer me any cocaine, which occasionally would happen."

"Last night was Pizza/Trivia night at the restaurant I serve at. I'm helping a couple in their mid to late fifties with Pop Culture questions (against restaurant policy). We're all laughing and having a great time when the wife leans over to her husband and says, 'She's so cute. Can I ask her to come home with us?' While I'm standing there. I laughed it off and got a $40 tip on a $60 check. And their phone number."

"I don't really remember the name used, but it went like this: 'What's Jennifer up to?' 'Oh, she's probably fucking my husband.' This was at a table of 5 women who looked to be in their 60's."

"I used to work at a bakery/bistro type place, and one time there was this table of a four or five brunch-y ladies talking quietly to each other. I overheard one of them say something about an orgy, and another responded, also about the orgy. I walked past their table again to try and overhear more, and realized they were talking about 4G."

"'I can't believe you're going to lose your virginity tonight,' said at a family table. I like to think they were all quick-witted and were purposefully messing with me."

"I've been thinking about this a lot lately, and I think I would save so much money if I just ate one big meal a day." "Yeah, but like... then you're going to get hungry later." "...... yeah, I guess you're right." Pretty sure they were high.